All intrusive thoughts, memories or sensations have one thing is common.
YOU HAVE FED THEM.
Sorry, I know it seems strange but it is true. The converse is also true.
THE LESS YOU FEED THEM THE EASIER THEY DIE.
What this translates to is this: You are giving mouth to mouth resuscitation to things you actually want to die. You are feeding things that seriously detracting from your mental health. I do know that your experience is likely to be 'I am not doing it, it just happens'. And of course that is how it feels because you have fed these destructive processes for quite a long time.
The alternative is this:- I was talking to a man today who has been using Anxiety Wizard for 8 weeks. He related all of the improvements in his life but the one most pertinent here is that he said he went for long periods of time where he forgot to be anxious. He even noted that he had days where anxiety was partially of completely forgotten and only when he remembered he had forgotten...
Learn how your brain tricks you into thinking and doing all sorts of crazy stuff. You won't believe it.